Brawl in a Sauna
by Murdoc Hunter
Summary: Ashley Mizuki Robbins needs a break from her nagging family. IF needs to get away from the chaos that her friends always seem to attract. What happens when these two characters with a short fuse meet in a sauna? Well, let's just say that meeting in a hot steam room isn't an idea situation... I own nothing but my pride...I think...
1. The Meeting

**_Brawl in a Sauna  
The Meeting_**

Ashley Mizuki Robbins was relaxing after a long day of helping her aunt and father, Jessica and Richard Robbins, move into their new two story home. Earlier that month, Richard had finally put his past away and left J.C. Valley and decided, in favor of spending more time with his sister and his, as of lately, grouchy daughter, that they would move to a house with room for them all. However, Jessica had been extremely opposed to the idea, after she and Ashley had spent most of their lives in that Manhattan apartment.  
*****************************Flashback************ ****************************  
"Let's see if got this straight, Richard." Jessica said with some fury in her voice. "I'm suppose to just pack up everything and just move!? What about the memories I've…"  
"Hold on, Jess." Richard said, cautiously looking around the living room where they were having their discussion. "Remember, we're to refrain from using words that would make Ashley upset again. Talking about memories, is something we should be careful about. Now about the moving, I found a nice place that is close to the university that you teach at now, and it has the most spectacular view of the city from the upstairs bedrooms. You two would love it!" Richard said, as his face was beaming with pride. Jessica sighed. "Uh huh…Have you discussed any of this with Ashley, by the way?" Richard turned his head in shame before answering his younger sister. "Well…I…um, no?" Jessica, once again raised her voice. "You see? How could you possibly be so dense!? You don't even consider the fact that Ashley may not even like the idea of moving!? I don't like the idea of this, especially so suddenly! How about putting others feelings into this before your own, Richard!?"  
"Hey, auntie Jess." The surprisingly calm voice of Ashley interrupted the two arguing adults, as the two looked upstairs to see the youngest household member walking towards them with a red backpack slung around her shoulders. Wearing her usually attire of a sleeveless red top that reveals a little bit of her toned yet slender stomach, and her tight black jeans and a pair of pink and white sneakers. "Two things before I go. First, I say let's move, _**BUT**_ next time, **_DAD_**, ask me first. Frankly, I'm tired of this cramped apartment anyway, and the house would do us some good." Jessica opened her mouth to protest, but a finger jabbed at her ribcage stopped her from saying anything. "Secondly, Don't make decisions based on your feelings. I'm going on 19 years old, so maybe I could have a say in something around here. You might have memories here, but _I_ don't. Only the ones that make me think of how my dad would always leave and break his promises of being a family. This house dad found is going to be a new slate for me. For all of us."  
"Now if you don't mind I'm going to meet some friends at the spa. I need the relaxation after dealing with you two children." Ashley said with a smile before she walked out into the world, leaving her two family members shocked and in awe. Richard decided to break the silence. "Um…did Ashley just call us children?" Jessica looked at Richard and before they knew it, they were laughing. "She's gotten more mature ever since meeting Mathew and Elizabeth, hasn't she?" Richard asked. Jessica nodded. "We do need to take her much more seriously. How well do we know her, really?"

Ashley was walking past her school on the way to her destination, when her cell phone rang. Looking at the caller, she flipped it open. "Hello, this is Ashley. Are you getting ready, or are you just getting up, Lizzy?" The caller, Elizabeth Alfred, only sighed into the phone. "Really, Ash? You should know me better than that. I've been ready, but Sofie has had problems at her house lately, so I told her I'd help her clear things up so she can come with us. You go on ahead, we'll be there, so don't turn your hair gray about it…oops, it already is, huh?" Ashley fumed as Lizzy's haughty laugh was heard through the phone. "Ugh, fine. I'll give you guys two hours. But if you two aren't there, I'm leaving!…Oh, that's my bus. See ya!" Ashley said as she quickly closed the phone to end the call and boarded the bus. "_Finally, some time away from my family. I'll just go to the sauna while I wait for those two…_" Ashley thought to herself as she leaned against the window, watching the scenery go by.

************************************************** *******************************

"Iffy…C'mon! Let me come, please? I'll be your bestest friend for-ever!"  
IF groaned as she was constantly followed by Neptune, also known as the CPU Purple Heart of Planeptune. "**NO**, Nep. I told you, I want to be left alone at the spa! That means you can't come."  
IF tried to turn the corner to escape Neptune, but instead ran into…"Red?! What are you doing here?" Red, or as she calls herself, Royal Emperor Dragon, rushed to IF and tackled her to the floor. "There's my wifey no.1! What's this I'm hearing about you leaving? Have I done something wrong?" She pouts while giving IF puppy dog eyes. Normally, IF would've caved in, but this time she need this break, this vacation from her friends, the CPU's and the fighting that she was facing every other day. "You haven't done anything yet, but if you don't get off of me right this second, you'll be losing valuable charisma points!" Red, shocked, immediately removed herself from her self-proclaimed wifey. IF composed herself, straightening her hair and brushing herself off. Instead of her usual attire, she wore a red leaf hairpin and a red headband. She had a white shirt on with a red collar, red bloomers, and a red jacket with black trimmings around the collar, sleeves, pockets and bottom edge. "Listen, you two. I just need to get away to relax for a while. Lady Green Heart gave me these tickets for…"  
"You're going with Vert!?" Neptune said in dismay. "B-B-But, what about all the times we've shared…in bed…" Red and IF nearly fainted. "HEY! That's my wifey you're talking about!" She declared before turning to IF herself. "And how dare you sleep with her before you sleep with me…That's so cruel…" IF began to pull at her hair. "ARRGH! It isn't what it sounds like, Red. And Neptune, stop making it sound so perverted! We only did that because there were only two beds and Compa snuggles too roughly…" Red stamped her feet. "Noooo! Compa, too!?" IF, completely infuriated, stormed out of the room and out the door, slamming it closed. "_Those two are the main reason why I'm even going to this spa. I hope Lady Green Heart is right about this…_"  
**************************Flashback-Leanbox Basilicom**************************  
"Iffy, you look really tired. Are you sure you don't want a massage?" Vert, or Lady Green Heart, the CPU of Leanbox asked her younger friend, IF, with sparkles in her eyes. IF, however, was aware of the suspicious look in her eyes. "Umm, no thank you, Lady Green Heart. I just need to get away from the group for awhile, that's all." Vert nodded as she walked over to vanity mirror and began looking in her drawers. "Nep and Red, I assume, is the main cause of your stress?" IF turned to look at Vert, wondering what she was doing in the drawers, as she was searching almost frantically for something. "Yes. Those two are definitely on an infinite sugar high…what are you doing, Lady Green Heart?" As IF slowly began walking to her voluptuous friend, Vert turned around and held three pieces of thin paper in IF's face, nearly hitting her in the nose. "Found them!" IF leaned back towards the bed. "W-what did you find? Those look like tickets to something."  
"And tickets they are, Iffy! These are tickets to a really great spa in Seattle, Washington…" IF's eyes shot open. "Wait, Seattle, _WASHINGTON_!? That's in a whole different dimension! What are you doing with…" Vert gently placed a slender finger on IF's lips. "Relax, Iffy. Whenever I wanted to get away from the duties of being the CPU, I would go to where nobody could find me. These are your passes to paradise, IF. Please take them and use them at your leisure. I guarantee when you get back you'll be relaxed and refreshed!"  
**********************IF POV Time-Gateway to Worlds****************************

"_Well, I never thought I'd ever be using these. But after the fiasco that those two put me through, I need this little break…_" IF closed her eyes and focused her thoughts as she walked through the glowing portal, taking her to a world not to much different than her own, the bustling city streets reminded her of Lastation, while the lush greenery was very similar to Leanbox. The weather was a little chill, but not as cold as Lowee, and the technology people used not only for traveling, but for just about everything, was like Planeptune. "_Okay, now according to the map that Lady Green Heart gave to me, the spa should be about a block from here…_"

**********************At Some Random, Reputable Spa****************************

Ashley made her way past the males that were giving her lustful looks and breath a sigh of relief as she entered the steamy sauna. _"Stupid Lizzy…Wish she would've told me it was a unisex spa. At least the sauna and spa have gender specific rooms._" She said to no one in particular. Keeping her towel wrapped tightly around her, she noticed that the room was quite large and had about 3 steam generators. Smiling at her environment, she slowly walked to an empty bench and sat down, leaning against the wooding wall. _"You know, I might stay a little bit longer than a few hours. I'm in no real rush to get back to my nagging family…huh?_"  
Ashley looked to her right at the entrance to see a girl about her age with long burgundy hair and an exasperated face. She looked around the room and noticed that Ashley was looking at her. This continued for about another minute before the long haired girl narrowed her eyes, huffed, then walked over to another bench to relax. Ashley rolled and closed her eyes, leaning back against the wall to enjoy her time at the spa.  
The girl with brown hair, IF, sat down and took one last look at the girl with the silver white hair, and laid down on her towel, stomach down on the bench, having her back and ass exposed to the hot steam. Both girls stayed in that position until… "Miss Ashley Robbins and Miss IF. Please come to the front desk, your cell phones are ringing. "miss Ashley Robbins and Miss IF…." Both rose from their comfortable spots and sluggishly made their way to the exit, but in their lazy state, they bumped into each other, dropping their towels. "Hey, excuse me! Watch yourself!" IF said, reaching for her towel. Ashley frowned, also reaching for her towel. "I'm sorry, but you were in MY way! And that's MY towel!" Unfortunately, while reaching for their towels, they bumped heads and fell on the slippery floor.  
"Ouuch! You klutz! You're grabbing my hair!"  
"Then let go of my towel! Besides, you don't have much hair to grab, anyway!"  
Ashley and IF eventually was able to pick up their towels, and after giving each other the evil eye, stormed off to get to their respective PA calls. IF felt like steam was coming from her ears. "What a bitch! I already have enough troubles with Nep and Red, and sometimes even Lady Green Heart. But now I've run into another stubborn brat! Ugh…Yes, I'm IF. I've come for my phone." The clerk nodded and handed the young brunette her carry bag. As she went through the blue bag, he notice something strange. IF pulled out a blue phone, looked at it, shook her head and placed it to the side. Then she pulled out a green one, and did the same. This happened for a good four more phones before she pulled a pink one and nodded before flipping it open to return her call. "…Yes, what is it, Compa?…No! You need to put your foot down in that case…I'm not coming back until later tonight….Don't worry about where I am right now, I'm fine and that's all those two need to know. I'm hanging up now….Alright good-bye."  
As IF returned the phones to the bag and handed it back to the clerk, the clerk himself decided to quench his curiosity. "Excuse me, miss. I'm just wondering why you need so many phones?" IF smiled, brushing some of her hair out of her eyes. "Well, I work with many people. Some of which are competitors with each other. I would prefer if I didn't have a clash while on the phone with a competitor. Do you understand now?" The clerk thought about it. "…Nope. Not at all, but you have your reasons, so I won't pry." IF bowed politely and made her way to the shower room. "Thank you for that. This is a very nice establishment, by the way." She said before walking out the door.  
Ashley, fuming, walked to the clerk on the opposite side of the building where she checked in. "I DON'T need THIS! I have been through too much to put up with…with her! What was her name again, IF? What kind of name is IF!? Is it an alias or something? Ugh, why did I have to run into someone like her…"  
"Excuse me, miss. You're kind of spacing out and talking to yourself." The voice of the clerk brought the young lady back to reality. "Oh, I'm sorry. I've been going through a few things lately, and it just got to me, that's all. I came up for the phone call. My name's Ashley." The clerk nodded sympathetically. "It happens to the best of us, ma'am. Here's your phone…"  
"Although you really don't need it anymore, do you Ash?" The voice next to her shook Ashley as she looked behind her to see her friends Elizabeth and Sofia Callaghan dressed in their bikinis. "Lizzy! When did you and Sofie get here?" Sofia blushed. "Well, we tried to call you, but you took so long to get to the phone that by the 3rd time we called, we where already here." Elizabeth wrapped her towel around her neck and crossed her arms. "What happened in here? You look rather upset for some reason." Ashley sighed in relief. "Let's talk about it on the way to the pool. It was pretty awkward…"  
***************************Present Time-Seattle Valley***************************  
Ashley was drinking a cream soda while talking to Matthew Crusoe, a close friend she met when she was 16. "You know, I never ran into that person again. I plan on going back there today. I need the stress relief after helping Dad and auntie Jess get all of our stuff into this house." Matthew laughed on the other end of the line. "Wow, that sounds like a pain. So, how's the place? How far is it, 'cause you know I'll be there for the house warming party!" Ashley smirked. "Yeah, right! If I can even have a house warming party…Oh, their back, so that's my cue to get outta here before they put me to work again. I'll talk to you later tonight, Matt." Matthew sighed. "Well, don't stay out too late. A beautiful girl like you could get into a lot of trouble if you aren't careful, Ash." Ashley giggled and blushed. "Flattery will get you nowhere…at least not with my dad around. Bye, Matty." Ashley closed her phone and made her way down the stairs to the front door. "I'm going out now. I'll call when I'm coming back." Ashley quickly said before exiting the front door. Making her way to the spa that she and her friends attended regularly. She paid her fee and, after changing, walked into the sauna once again…  
"…YOU!…"

T.B.C.


	2. Awkward Moments

**_Brawl in a Sauna  
Awkward Moments_**  
Ashley Mizuki Robbins and IF stared at the wood planked walls in the hot, steamy sauna, their backs facing each other in the empty room. Both not moving an inch as they sat on the same bench, Ashley swallowed hard, not really wanting to be the one to break the silence, and sat there with her body facing the wall. IF sat facing the opposite wall, gripping her towel almost to the point of her nails ripping through it. However, not wanting to deal with the silence any longer, she decided to speak first. "Come here often?" Ashley thought about only nodding, but remembered that they weren't looking at each other. "Usually with a few friends. You?" IF nervously began pulling at her towel, but stopped, noticing a small rip where her nail was. "Not too often. This is my second time here. The spa is nice." Ashley never looked at IF. "Yeah…" The short brunette sighed heavily, turning her head to the side with a small smirk on her face._ "Geez, girl! This conversation is like trying to pull teeth!"_  
Ashley, on the other hand, was just as uncomfortable as IF._ "This really sucks! Trying to relax with this tension is bad, but I can't just push her out the door, either. This is a free country, but why should__** I**__ leave just because of…?"_ Ashley grimaced while she was deep in thought, and IF noticed. "Hey! You know, there's no reason to stay in here with me if you're that uncomfortable. Just leave."

Ashley, shaken out of her thoughts, turned to face IF, who was already looking at her. "What do you mean 'just leave'!? I have just as much right to be here as you do! Why don't you leave?" IF laughed, before taking a deep breath and stood up in front of Ashley. "I came in here first, so what gives you seniority?" Ashley, however, didn't stay seated. Standing, trying to give off a threatening aura to IF, she crossed her arms. "Seniority or not, it's a free country, so I don't have to go anywhere. Again,_ why don't you leave_, shorty?" Ashley finished her sentence by poking IF on her forehead. IF leaned back from the pressure of Ashley's poke, but still stood firm. "Yeah, real childish, A-cup!" IF retorted, pushing Ashley at her chest, also knocking her towel off. Ashley growled as she pulled IF's towel off. "Better to be an A-cup instead of having a flat chest!"  
Ashley looked down at IF's legs and smirked. "You even have a pair of man legs!"  
IF frowned as Ashley snickered at her own remark. "Seems you haven't looked in a mirror lately. With short hair and absolutely_** NO**_ ass, you might as well go join the men's area!" She said, crossing her arms crossly.

Ashley and IF balled up their fists as each stared fiercely, waiting for the other to make a move. However, as they were both in a sauna, the heat from the room mixed with their boiling blood caused both of them to fall back on the moist wooden bench. IF, breathing heavily, turned to Ashley. "You didn't really plan on fighting me, did you? I have these so-called 'man legs' for a reason." Ashley chuckled, although it sounded more like a raspy gasp for air. "…No. You just piss me off for some reason. I don't even remember why…OH, God! I need air!" Ashley quickly tried to stand, but fell back down. IF caught her by her arm before she completely hit the floor. "Hey, you ok, Ashley? Holy shit, girl! You're burning up!" The shorter brunette slowly began to carry her as best as she could to the showers to cool her off, but as strong as she was, IF had lost some strength from arguing with Ashley earlier. "Geez. You really are a lightweight, huh?" Ashley smirked as she leaned on IF's shorter body. "I didn't expect to nearly pass out here. I've dealt with ghost, conspiracies and killers, but I'm about to keel over due to a heat stroke. And don't let any of my friends find out. They'd never let me live it down." IF shook her head. "Don't worry about it. I'm always on guard and on edge, and that's against my friends. They're nuts! I mean completely bonkers...

"Oh, really? Is that how you treat the one that generously gave you those spa passes?" IF's eyes were like saucers as she heard the calm voice of the CPU of Lastation, Vert. "So, this is where you disappear to, Vert! Oh, Iffy's here!" was the always hyper voice of the CPU of Planeptune, Neptune. IF turned pale. "V-V-Vert! Neptune! What the HELL is she doing here!? I thought you said this was a secret, Lady Green Heart?" Vert sighed. "Yes it was, but you know how Neptune is..." Neptune smiled her trademark grin as she made her way inside the steamy sauna. "Yep, yep! I followed Vert alllll the way here. First you disappear for days, and then boobalisious here runs off in a suspicious manner. By the way, why are you naked holding another naked girl? You swing that way? Compa's gonna be fur~ious! Not to mention Red. Oooo, maybe I should tell her..." Vert crossed her arms over her largely developed breast. "I also was wondering the same thing. And after all this time you've been ignoring my advances..." IF was completely speechless.  
Ashley looked up at the violet haired girl. She had a slim figure with a small, but cute belly. Her legs were not as toned as IF's, but were smooth nonetheless. She slowly began to rise to her feet, much to the surprise of IF. "Hey. You ok, Ashley? Can you stand?" Ashley slowly nodded. "Yeah. The door's open so the air isn't so heavy with steam. Thanks." When she stood straight, she took a look at Vert. She looked like she was in her early to late 20's, but her demeanor said otherwise, as if she has lived for centuries. And, of course, she couldn't help but see her breast. In fact, that's where most of her attention was. "Thundertits..." was all she could utter.  
"That's what I said, too." All four toweled ladies turned to see a short brunet clasping tightly to her towel that wrapped around her slender porcelain like frame. She looked at Ashley without expression, before walking past them to sit comfortably on the bench farthest away from them. And seemingly out of nowhere, she pulled out a novel like book and began to read to herself. Back at the door an elegant lady stood there with one hand on her waist and the other hanging on her side. She also had two long black pigtails. "Well, here we go again. Another fine mess you've dragged us into, Neptune. But at least this place looks a little more relaxing." The short girl only nodded before giving a response, never removing her eyes from her book. "Mmm. It's all Neptune's damn fault..." Neptune stamped her feet like a spoiled child, which totally looked like something she'd do, Ashley noted. "That is so not true! In fact, why are you even saying that, Blanc? You look pretty comfortable reading that book in here. And Noire, why are you even in here if it was just 'another mess'?" The black haired girl, Noire, blushed and stammered her words. "Wh-what are you talking about, Neptune? I only am taking advantage of the situation! It's not like I was following you or anything. I saw Blanc following you and decided to see what was going on, that's all." The one reading, Blanc, focused her eyes on Noire. "Then how is it you're dressed so lightly? Did you know about this?" Ashley couldn't tell if the steam was making Noire's face so read or if it was embarrassment. "Ugh! Well, the same can be said about you, Blanc!" Blanc gently closed her book. "That's right. I did know about it. I had been wondering about Vert's disappearances for quite some time. So when she vanished again, I snuck around her room. What's your reason?"  
Ashley sighed before looking at IF. "I suppose this happens a lot, huh?" IF only held the temples of her head, groaning loudly. "Someone, kill me now..."

T.B.C.


End file.
